I’m writing this right now on my laptop’s battery to be posted to the internet later because the Power is out in the house right now. I’m about to go crazy without my internet and TV….AHHHHHHH. I don’t know how it is out, but this is the last electrical thing I can use, and I only have a limited battery life, so I’ll try to be as concise as possible but don’t count on it being all the concise.
The Godsearch message board has been an interesting place. As many of you know, I love a good debate. In fact some would say that I am compelled to it by my nature. In the Keirsey temperament sorter I am an ENTP, which means Extroverted, iNtuitive, Thinking, Percieving, and my profile says that I will debate anything for the sake of debating it, and I won’t understand why peoples feelings get hurt in the discussion/argument. Now, I have been reading over some of my own posts as well as some other peoples on the message board and it seems fairly evident that there is more then one person like me out there who is just carrying on for the sake of carrying on. Now this wouldn’t be a problem if it were all these people in a room doing this, because they understand what they are debating and that no one needs to be hurt in the process and we can still respect each other even though we disagree. But on the internet we have a problem. There are a lot of people shying away from this message board because of the amount of people like me posting for the sake of it who are forceful with their thoughts and opinions and not considerate of others thoughts and opinions (again me being one of them), and there are people who are offended or worried about some things. Like they will ask themselves does my Pastor/Small Group Leader/Friend really think like this, and if they do how come it never sounds like this when I talk to them, or these topics never come up. Now we can wave off that they don’t know that we all like just carrying on debating and we don’t teach controversial things in church/small group unless the Bible says we have to, but this is besides the point. I believe that much of the entire board is a few people trying to glorify themselves (once agian…myself included), and they don’t realize it. No ENTP will easily come to the conclusion that they can’t see other peoples pain that they cause through this because they are too busy with their own pride. That is a hard truth that all ENTP’s must deal with sooner or later. We often argue to be right, or just show people how smart we are or how well our “academic” opinions are formed, and we don’t care about our audience and how it will effect them. I’m afraid this is the case on this message board and it is not building very many people up right now. It has turned into a place that is helping the people like myself who grow through this kind of debate and discussion, but is hindering weaker Christians and people who are easily offended or confused right now.
So I propose a personal goal and I would challenge the other people ENTP or similar who love a good debate with this. Post less, post more about how good other peoples posts are. Never state anything as clear, obvious or hogwash. Your not right, and neither are they, admit it, get over it, not a lot of things in the Bible are clear, your class at the Vineyard or your parents seminary degree does not make them or you right nor does it make their/your interpretation clear or obvious, so stop saying it is. You / I are/am saying these things in a manner using words like clearly, obviously, logically, hogwash, balderdash, or bad theology and it is not helpful to others. You do not make your point by being forceful (read my how to win a debate without cheating) or calling people stupid. I and some other people didn’t realize this, but this stuff has become more about inflating our ego’s and not about helping people understand things. Some places have gotten better, but some haven’t. Also, on the internet there is no tone in your posts. Writing has a tone, but if you are a person who conveys information with a lot of different voice inflections and tone changes writing like you speak is not wise because you will convey things in a manner different then you intended. I have learned and am still learning this, the hard way. So people help keep me honest in this endeavor/challenge, I’m going to approach this now with as much humility as I can muster. And I’m going to stay away as much as possible, but I am drawn to these things like a moth to a flame, so I can’t promise I’ll stay out of some of them. But as a leader I need to hold myself to this higher standard of not purposefully jumping into these kind of arguments and situations.
OK, so this is good setup for an interesting small group evening. So lately our small group has been flowing in the Holy Spirit a lot lately. Fun stuff like people falling on the floor and speaking in tongues and interpretations. I’ve been kinda wondering if this was something that would last for a while, like if we had a season of good stuff when would the period of normalcy return. What I wasn’t expecting is an attack from Satan, and that was stupid. The kingdom of darkness doesn’t like it when a lot of good stuff is going on for people and they don’t like them becoming more effective at ministering and discipling and they don’t like people becoming healed and seeing the light of God and growing in his word. So if he doesn’t like that stuff, shouldn’t you expect him to try to smash it. Well, long and the short of the story is that we had some of that this week. Last night we saw feelings unintentionally hurt during a discussion (not during the actual lesson, but before hand) and a person left during worship because of it. This argument actually started over things said recently on the message board (there is my tie in, wasn’t that slick). Then we saw a demon manifestation which scared the crap out of some people. Rob wanted to call the paramedics, which is something I’ve been thinking a lot about since he said that he was gonna call 911, like when do you give spiritual attention and when do you give medical attention. But this was pretty major stuff so you can’t blame him, probably one of the worst I’ve seen personally, not the worst story I’ve heard by far, but still not good stuff. I’m glad that person is better. A little confused about the whole deal, but better none the less. So that is the praise report, that people praying were able to cast out the demon. And the craziest part of this whole deal for me is that I had a test last night. So from 7-9 I was occupied….which is when the bulk of small group happens. So I walked in the door sometime between 9:15-9:30 and saw someone laying on the ground, people praying over them, and a few people milling around not knowing what to do, and Rob pacing…as usual…upset, drinking a beer and telling me how we should call the paramedics. Then I eventually arrive at the conclusion that there are a few people missing so I ask if they went home because they didn’t know what to do, or what was going on, and I find out that they bailed because they were hurt and subsequently pissed. So all in all it was a crazy night. The joke was made that I’m not allowed to have small group without being there anymore, but I really feel like I wouldn’t have changed much of this because Satan was on full attack. I might have helped, but I’m guessing a lot of lies were being spoken to people to provoke emotions and amplify unintentional discouragement. I’m really super happy that God showed up and revealed the demon and delivered the person from it, I’m just bummed that it had to be as loud and up front as it ended up being.
Well, anyway, power is back, and I have some stuff I want to write later about my feelings about how the Vineyard, our church and denomination, is run. Like it’s strengths and weaknesses and why I call it home instead of the Methodist church that my family is heavily a part of (both my parents are ordained pastors), and things that I don’t necessarily like but don’t think are important enough to ever leave over, and the things that are so important that if I were to move I would look for the nearest vineyard so I could know that they held those values.
OK, long enough now, maybe I’ll write more this weekend with updates about small group stuff, but until then…..
Thank you, and goodnight.
Paul Egli says
Last time I took that test thingydoodle I was INTP,,, but that was a long time ago.
Paul Egli says
I bet that made for one interesting small group report 😀 … (you DO do you small group reports, right? 🙂
Dirk says
I just wanna say your assesment (both small group thing and message board thing) is right on and I totally agree with you.
Ben says
Yeah, Lauren told me she wrote it up today the whole thing and it should be a pretty interesting read.
Janine says
me too – on agreeing.
Who reads the small group reports?
Paul Egli says
pastors & coaches
Matt says
“like when do you give spiritual attention and when do you give medical attention”
I’m don’t quite understand something. Wouldn’t it have been safer to just call the paramedics anyway as soon as possible and also give the personal spiritual attention, instead of waiting and debating whether to get medical attention? What would’ve happened if this person ended up not getting better and got worse or died, not just from a spiritual nature, from from a legal one?
Janine says
definitely unintentional, but still completely inappropriate.
Ben says
Well you raise an excellent question that is the subject of much debate around here today. I am going to post more on my thoughts on this sometime later when I have time and energy for it. But in this case there were some specifics that gave us reason to seriously doubt that there was any physical problem at all, but there was an uncertainty factor that we need to eliminate if anything like this ever happens agian (and hopefully it won’t). I would say more about specifically what happened and how things got a little out of whack, but I don’t want to go into specifics for the sake of annonimity (as Seth and Rob like to point out there is a reason you don’t know who the diocees(sp?) exorcist is and that is to protect the people who he helps privacy as well as his own). In this case it ended well, after praying over this and casting out the demon the physical symptoms almost completely disappeared, or the ones that were the cause for immediate alarm that may have had someone calling the paramedics. But like I said there were some things that we have learned from and I’ll write more about it later and explain what I’m thinking more clearly without any specifics that I don’t feel at liberty to talk about publically so my thoughts can be expanded to a more general context.